Update

 I haven't written something that's not poetry in a while but its definitely time to do so now. This post is to inform anyone reading this of some good news and some bad news. 

First, the bad news. I'm going to start taking down many of my previous posts. Basically all of my attempts at poetry and a few other pieces will be deleted over the next week or so. 

The good news is that I'm working on a book and plan to publish it before the year is done, Lord willing. I hope to keep y'all updated on that and to post on here when time permits.

Identity

 

This week
I lost my keys.
I looked in 15 wrong places
before I found them
where they didn’t belong

Misplacing things is common
so is losing
identity

This week
I lost me.
I looked in a hundred wrong places
success, debate, the library
phone calls, written words, my family
behind a closet of masks
and a pile of facades
between accolades
and failures
underneath deep rooted insecurity
far away from verses I knew by memory
I found my worth
where it didn’t belong

Misplacing ourselves is common
we all struggle to find
identity

Cheesy quotes on self-esteem
tell us that we are worth
more than we could believe
But I want to believe
that I’m actually worth something
so very quickly I find myself chasing
chasing….
chasing fame and popularity
shaping how people think of me

losing my identity

I am the lost sheep
worried about what the other 99 see
so I count them to fall asleep
and wonder if anyone
really knows me
and wonder if I
really know me

When I’ve looked in my
99 wrong places
in all the usual, blank, empty spaces
that’s when my identity finds me
my Shepherd leaves the 99
and chases me
chases…
chases a sinner who loses her keys
I look at His hands and His side
I am reminded
that by His blood I am defined
I am bought with a price

My worth isn’t found in me
it’s in a ransom paid by my King

what I wish I could hear

 

What I wish someone would say to me
(and me actually believe)
You are more than what you have achieved
Do you remember when Christ set you free?
take as long as you need
can I give you a hug?
Where you are right now is not just luck
no, you don’t need makeup
I’m listening
have you prayed about it?
what is the Lord teaching you?
what do you want to do?
God is using you
call me anytime
I want to be part of your life
your scars prove that you’re alive
let’s just drive
how’s your relationship with God?
He has given you a purpose
Rejoicing is spiritual service
Christ is worthy of worship
I’m proud of you
You are enough
You are loved

These words sound so cliché
maybe you’ve heard them already today
or maybe you’re like me
longing to see the sun through the rain
to find the peace in the fray
needing truth
and if that’s you
than those are the words I would say